I Hate People

So due to my surgery I am unable to get back to my normal job duties. As the Dr thinks I'm a candy ass and has ordered me on light duty until the first of the year. Whats worse is my boss' are honoring the Dr's wishes and keeping me on light duty. Now for a meat Department that means I'm not allowed to cut meat at all but instead of set up demo's for all the mouth breathers. Thus for the next week I get to cook and hand out peices of delicious animal flesh to those who don't deserve it.

Here is a list of shit that people tell me and my response to what they say.

• Do you work here? NO I don't work here I just fucking wear a name tag and an apron handing out food for shits and giggles you cuntface asshat.
• I know you don't work in the meat department but do you know where the Pepperoni is? Thats right I don't work in the Meat department even though I'm wearing a fucking baseball cap that has a gods damn cow on it and the hat says Hereford Beef, and I wear a black apron that is the same color as all the other meat guys, and I fucking have blood stains on my shirt. Or the fact that I'm handing out ham you fucking twat.
• Is this ham cooked? You must be a moron, do you know what uncooked ham is called? Its called Pork Roast you fucktard. All Ham is at least partially cooked, and besides why in the hell would I be handing out raw meat?
• Oh this meat is so salty. No its not to salty you old hag. Your just a pussy. Sodium Chloride happens to be an excellent preservative and don't try to tell me that my pork tenderloin is saltier than the salt pork you used to eat back 80 years ago. Idiot.
• This is so way to spicy You say that the Maple flavored breakfast sausage is spicy again wench and I will crush your skull. Spicy is when you and your friends chug Tabasco bottles and like it.

If you can't drink a gallon of tabasco than your not going to Valhalla

What I guess I'm trying to get at is don't open your fucking mouth to me. It is humiliating as it is that I am unable to do my manly job. But to make me even speak to you makes it so that I may break you in half with my massive cock. Another thing. If you want to be a pussy and not eat the tasty meat product that I give out. Don't give me a long winded explanation. I honestly don't give a shit. I get paid by an hourly wage. I do not get paid by commison therfore I do not care if you buy the food as I am not paid any extra if you buy it. That is all.