Beelte Bailey Should He Die?

Beetle Bailey is a comic strip about an incredibly lazy solider called Beetle Bailey. Your average comic strip consists of his DI yelling at him to get out of bed. Beetle says no he wants to sleep, and then he does something like catch the NCO barracks on fire.

Beetle has been in the army since 1950 and he is still a private. Thats 56 years of service and he has yet to even deploy. Where in the fuck was Beetle when we were conscripting men into Korea and Vietnam? Why do I as a tax payer get to support his stupid ass.


Do you want this man protecting you from Terrorism.

Don't even get me on his superiors. General Halftrack is such a puss that he allows his wife dictate his training regime for his men. His greatest offense as an officer is that he allows soldiers like Beetle to live off of the army like parasites. The good General isn't fit to command a mess hall, not the finest fighting force of all time (Besides the Israeli Armed Forces)

Sarge is a bumbling moron, who couldn't lead his men on a nature hike. He some how thinks that yelling at Beetle will get him to work. How about he punishes the rest of the unit for Beetles laziness, then we'll see how many blanket parties it takes for Beetle to man the fuck up.

Just the other day I read a comic where Beetle was pulling Sarge up a cliff with a rope. Sarge says that they still have a lot of work to do. The next frame has Sarge dangling and the moon is up. Its implied that Beetle left a man behind because he didn't want to take personal responsibility. We all know how I feel about leaving a fellow man behind. Hell while most soldiers are in a band of brothers, Beetle is at the local whore house.

Golfing instead of fighting terror? I wish we all had that kind of free time

Hey Beetle you keep on saying Sunday is your day off, well guess what? War doesn't ever take a day off. Ask the troops who were nearly wiped out by the Krauts during Christmas of 44. The Airborne didn't take time off because it was Christmas. And your enemy will never take time off either.

I want to know why its funny to watch Beetle sit around and say fuck you to America while we have boys deploying to Iraq three even four times. Beetle shows the highest disregard to the American people. It would be best if we had the entire unit Beetle belongs to liquidated due to the gross mismanagement and the traitorous manner which its soldiers carry themselves.

I will hold to my conviction that Private Beetle Bailey US Army, is a traitor and should be executed with extreme prejudice.