Fat Chicks
So I had an encounter with a fat girl, needless to say it did not end well for Delta 2. After that I had spent time thinking about how fat girls act in a social environment.
Lets set up a situation for you. You the guy who wants to go out with cute girl. We'll call her Girl A. Now you have been friends with Girl A for many years, you want to get into a relationship with Girl A but never grew the balls because you never read my page about being a BAMF and women love BAMFs. Any who your position in Girl As circle of friends is important because you are horny guy friend who is "just a friend." This means that in the circle of friends you actually out rank any of Girl As boyfriends because they trust you but unfortunately for you, you don't get all the benefits of the boy friend. Anyway you one day go to hang out with Girl A, but something is amiss, Girl A has some one new hanging around. She is as corpulent as Jabba The Hutt. And as annoying as a clown. We'll call her Girl B. You find out that Girl B has been friends with Girl A for only a few short weeks. As soon as you enter the picture you will be under her scrutinizing gaze. She'll watch ever move you make, criticize you for ever foul comment you utter. She will go and tell Girl A that you are a jerk and that she should never see you again. This of course is after you have shown Girl A immense amounts of kindness (the same caliber of kindness that you get when Chuck Norris lets you live yet another day) And after you just bought everyone Taco's for supper.
Why would a complete stranger give you the cockblock like that? A cockblock with a person that you knrow far bette than they do? It's because Girl B is a fat chick. And fat chicks are notoriously bad at making decisions.
(Now this is where I'm going to make my disclaimer and say not all fat chicks are pricks. I know several ones that are actually very nice but for the sake of my rant we are going to imagine the fat girls as the ones who are annoying and only purpose they seem to have is to piss you off when your with there cute friends.)
You see fat girls have always been bad at making decisions, thats why they are fat, not just a little meaty which tell you the truth didn't hurt anyone. They can't actually go and make the choice not to eat that bucket of triple chocolate ice cream because they have a poor self image of themselves. They choose to be loud and distracting during social events, mainly because
they want to be at the center of everyones attention. This of course is a direct contradiction of the BAMF in training that you are thus you want to be the center of attention to show off to everyone how much closer you are to the Immortal God Emperor than they are.
Heads will clash. The fat girl wigill try to r your chances with all of the Girl As in the room. They do this for two reasons. One they don't like you and in the end they never want to see some one so Bad Assed as yourself be happy. Two being that they secretly hate Girl A. Mind you some Girl As, are bitches, some are not. It doesn't matter if Girl A has done anything directly to Girl B. What matters is that Girl A will always be more desirable than Girl B, and thus Girl B will give bad advice to Girl A on purpose.
Fat chicks will tell there attractive friends to go out with the Jocks who own big trucks. Now I don't want to stereotype those guys to much but... Those guys generally hit the peak of there lives at 17 when they are high school foot ball stars, mind you they get pussy even if they have a team which goes five seasons without winning a single game. (happened at my high school) These guys might go into college, might. If they do they go into business. Because we know it takes a lot of brains to pass macro economics after the third try. Mind you these guys miss the entire point of college which is to learn, by drinking every night. They drop out of college, marry the pretty girl, grow fat, beat said pretty girl, die at the age of 55. Now if those fat friends actually cared for the good looking friends they would hook the good looking girls up with the guys who have the highest rate of success, BAMFs. People who know how to get shit done because they are always in control. Even when they don't actually know how to get something done right they'll probably just use high explosives and get the job done through brute force.
What irks me about fat girls is how they will enter a complicated social situation and try to bring it all down. They have no appreciation that some people might actually have running jokes, or that acting like a jerk is just what some people do to every stranger they meet as its a way to assert dominance, that is less lethal than head butting. They just jump in and want to be the one that decides who gets to hang out with who. They kind of do what I do but you see I choose who gets to live and who gets to die.
Fat chicks hate the thought of other people being happy so they try to sabotage everyones happiness. They figure that misery loves company.
Lets set up a situation for you. You the guy who wants to go out with cute girl. We'll call her Girl A. Now you have been friends with Girl A for many years, you want to get into a relationship with Girl A but never grew the balls because you never read my page about being a BAMF and women love BAMFs. Any who your position in Girl As circle of friends is important because you are horny guy friend who is "just a friend." This means that in the circle of friends you actually out rank any of Girl As boyfriends because they trust you but unfortunately for you, you don't get all the benefits of the boy friend. Anyway you one day go to hang out with Girl A, but something is amiss, Girl A has some one new hanging around. She is as corpulent as Jabba The Hutt. And as annoying as a clown. We'll call her Girl B. You find out that Girl B has been friends with Girl A for only a few short weeks. As soon as you enter the picture you will be under her scrutinizing gaze. She'll watch ever move you make, criticize you for ever foul comment you utter. She will go and tell Girl A that you are a jerk and that she should never see you again. This of course is after you have shown Girl A immense amounts of kindness (the same caliber of kindness that you get when Chuck Norris lets you live yet another day) And after you just bought everyone Taco's for supper.
Why would a complete stranger give you the cockblock like that? A cockblock with a person that you knrow far bette than they do? It's because Girl B is a fat chick. And fat chicks are notoriously bad at making decisions.
(Now this is where I'm going to make my disclaimer and say not all fat chicks are pricks. I know several ones that are actually very nice but for the sake of my rant we are going to imagine the fat girls as the ones who are annoying and only purpose they seem to have is to piss you off when your with there cute friends.)
You see fat girls have always been bad at making decisions, thats why they are fat, not just a little meaty which tell you the truth didn't hurt anyone. They can't actually go and make the choice not to eat that bucket of triple chocolate ice cream because they have a poor self image of themselves. They choose to be loud and distracting during social events, mainly because
they want to be at the center of everyones attention. This of course is a direct contradiction of the BAMF in training that you are thus you want to be the center of attention to show off to everyone how much closer you are to the Immortal God Emperor than they are.
Heads will clash. The fat girl wigill try to r your chances with all of the Girl As in the room. They do this for two reasons. One they don't like you and in the end they never want to see some one so Bad Assed as yourself be happy. Two being that they secretly hate Girl A. Mind you some Girl As, are bitches, some are not. It doesn't matter if Girl A has done anything directly to Girl B. What matters is that Girl A will always be more desirable than Girl B, and thus Girl B will give bad advice to Girl A on purpose.
Fat chicks will tell there attractive friends to go out with the Jocks who own big trucks. Now I don't want to stereotype those guys to much but... Those guys generally hit the peak of there lives at 17 when they are high school foot ball stars, mind you they get pussy even if they have a team which goes five seasons without winning a single game. (happened at my high school) These guys might go into college, might. If they do they go into business. Because we know it takes a lot of brains to pass macro economics after the third try. Mind you these guys miss the entire point of college which is to learn, by drinking every night. They drop out of college, marry the pretty girl, grow fat, beat said pretty girl, die at the age of 55. Now if those fat friends actually cared for the good looking friends they would hook the good looking girls up with the guys who have the highest rate of success, BAMFs. People who know how to get shit done because they are always in control. Even when they don't actually know how to get something done right they'll probably just use high explosives and get the job done through brute force.
What irks me about fat girls is how they will enter a complicated social situation and try to bring it all down. They have no appreciation that some people might actually have running jokes, or that acting like a jerk is just what some people do to every stranger they meet as its a way to assert dominance, that is less lethal than head butting. They just jump in and want to be the one that decides who gets to hang out with who. They kind of do what I do but you see I choose who gets to live and who gets to die.
Fat chicks hate the thought of other people being happy so they try to sabotage everyones happiness. They figure that misery loves company.
posted by Delta2 at 11:25 PM
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