80s Action Week: Invasion USA
Today is Thursday and for the 80s Action Week we are going to party on Thursday with the Immortal God Emperor himself Chuck Norris. We are looking at Invasion USA which explains why the US has never been invaded since Those Mexicans and French invaded years back.
Gipper Approved?
Absofuckinglutly. Where to start? Is it the vigilanty attitude of Chuck Norris? Or maybe its the declaration of martial law? Or could it be that the bad guys are just plain old communists? Theres something for every American to love in this movie.
One Liners:
Chuck Norris-If you live through this, tell Rostov It's time to die.
Chuck Norris-Nikko was easy. Now it's your turn. One night you'll close your eyes, and when they open I'll be there. It'll be time to die.
Chuck Norris-See you in hell...Send Me a Post Card
Post Mortem One Liners:
Technically we have no post mortems in this movie but since your a dead man once Chuck Norris looks at you I think these apply.
Chuck Norris- Did you lose this?(explosion)
Chuck Norris0- It's Time
Pardon Me, But Do You Have Grey Poupon? With C4?
Gratuitous Acts Of Violence?
Well this movie is off the charts. We have a suberban neighborhood blown up with a rocket launcher, countless cars blown to bits, a Fair full of orphans blown up (we see the aftermath), a battle with the US Army, Really its just nonstop action. We have 146 on screen deaths in this movie but an honorable mention should be given out that these are only the onscreen deaths and really tens of thousands of people are killed during the events of this movie. Chuck Norris seems to favor blowing terrorists up to all other manners of killing. The head Villan even has nightmares about Chuck Norris. I guess I would say the most unique deaths were those when random guys would be killed by getting there nuts blown off...Did I mention that a whole boat full of Cuban immigrants was gunned down. That was pretty fucking cool because it happens in the first five minutes.
Sexual Content?
Chuck Norris goes about his movies with a FUCK WOMEN attitude, and it shows. He doesn't get close to any woman because he knows that in the end they will all die. Which leads us to our next subject. Brutality towards women. One of my favorite scenes in the entire movie is when this bitch is snorting cocaine, and the bad guy was like fuck you to the woman. So he smashes her head into the table while she has the straw stuck up her nose. It gets lodged and she screams alot, the bad guy then shoots her drug dealer boyfriend in the nuts and then turns around and throws her stupid ass out of a window. Needless to say that was my favorite death of all the movie, and I had to wait this entire time to tell you about it. We don't get any man asses, and we have a respectable 6 womens lovelies.
No One Not Even You Will Remember If We Were Good Men Or Bad?
This movie was bad. Its only saving grace is the extreamly high amount of camp. The camp factor for this movie would be over nine thousand if I was to make a guess. The only reason people still watch this drawn out episode of Walker (thats right I said it, Invasion USA is just along high budget episode of Walker)
Misc
Was there a nuclear blast? No
Was someone kicked in the face? Oh yes multiple times.
Did a building explode? Hell yeah, to many to count.
Did something explode for no reason? Again Yes, every other object explodes in this movie.
Invasion USA may be camp but it does have our Emperor Chuck Norris and for that I give Invasion USA over nine thousand kicks to the face.
Gipper Approved?
Absofuckinglutly. Where to start? Is it the vigilanty attitude of Chuck Norris? Or maybe its the declaration of martial law? Or could it be that the bad guys are just plain old communists? Theres something for every American to love in this movie.
One Liners:
Chuck Norris-If you live through this, tell Rostov It's time to die.
Chuck Norris-Nikko was easy. Now it's your turn. One night you'll close your eyes, and when they open I'll be there. It'll be time to die.
Chuck Norris-See you in hell...Send Me a Post Card
Chuck Norris-You're beginning to irritate me
Post Mortem One Liners:
Technically we have no post mortems in this movie but since your a dead man once Chuck Norris looks at you I think these apply.
Chuck Norris- Did you lose this?(explosion)
Chuck Norris0- It's Time
Pardon Me, But Do You Have Grey Poupon? With C4?
Well this movie is off the charts. We have a suberban neighborhood blown up with a rocket launcher, countless cars blown to bits, a Fair full of orphans blown up (we see the aftermath), a battle with the US Army, Really its just nonstop action. We have 146 on screen deaths in this movie but an honorable mention should be given out that these are only the onscreen deaths and really tens of thousands of people are killed during the events of this movie. Chuck Norris seems to favor blowing terrorists up to all other manners of killing. The head Villan even has nightmares about Chuck Norris. I guess I would say the most unique deaths were those when random guys would be killed by getting there nuts blown off...Did I mention that a whole boat full of Cuban immigrants was gunned down. That was pretty fucking cool because it happens in the first five minutes.
Sexual Content?
Chuck Norris goes about his movies with a FUCK WOMEN attitude, and it shows. He doesn't get close to any woman because he knows that in the end they will all die. Which leads us to our next subject. Brutality towards women. One of my favorite scenes in the entire movie is when this bitch is snorting cocaine, and the bad guy was like fuck you to the woman. So he smashes her head into the table while she has the straw stuck up her nose. It gets lodged and she screams alot, the bad guy then shoots her drug dealer boyfriend in the nuts and then turns around and throws her stupid ass out of a window. Needless to say that was my favorite death of all the movie, and I had to wait this entire time to tell you about it. We don't get any man asses, and we have a respectable 6 womens lovelies.
No One Not Even You Will Remember If We Were Good Men Or Bad?
This movie was bad. Its only saving grace is the extreamly high amount of camp. The camp factor for this movie would be over nine thousand if I was to make a guess. The only reason people still watch this drawn out episode of Walker (thats right I said it, Invasion USA is just along high budget episode of Walker)
Misc
Was there a nuclear blast? No
Was someone kicked in the face? Oh yes multiple times.
Did a building explode? Hell yeah, to many to count.
Did something explode for no reason? Again Yes, every other object explodes in this movie.
Invasion USA may be camp but it does have our Emperor Chuck Norris and for that I give Invasion USA over nine thousand kicks to the face.
posted by Delta2 at 3:58 PM
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